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» humorous: teacher: what inspired you to write this essay? me: the due date.

humorous: teacher: what inspired you to write this essay? me: the due date.

humorous: teacher: what inspired you to write this essay? me: the due date.

» Dustbats: I’m On Medication That Can Make Me Spacey Af, Which Can Be A Problem When I’m Driving–Like Yesterday, For Example, When My Best Friend Was Trying To Help Me Avoid A Potholehe Said “To The Left,” And I Just Mumbled “Take It Back

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» Me Walking Out Of Bathroom: Woo! Nothing Like A Big, Satisfying Dump To Start Off The Weekend!Everyone Within Earshot: Stares DisgustedlyMe: For Fucks Sake! I Can’t Be Sexy All The Time. I’m Not Just Your Fantasy!Me: Storms Off

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» Fuckmestupid: I Hate Being On My Period Because I Don’t Know What I Want Out Of Life. Do I Want To Eat Chocolate???? Do I Want To Suck Dick??? Do I Want The Sweet Escape Of Death??!? I Don’t Know, But I’m Cranky Because I Don’t Have It!!! *Raises

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