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» She can ruin you even over Skype.

She can ruin you even over Skype.

» Jerk. Get Close. Stop. Go Limp. Repeat.

» Piercing Stuff

» At Least She&Amp;Rsquo;Ll Be Having A Good Time. And That&Amp;Rsquo;S What&Amp;Rsquo;S Important.

» Everyone Should Know Their Role In Life.

» I Would Plan On Tomorrow.

» Thousands Of Wankers Sitting At Their Computers Approve Of The Giant Black Rubber Dong You Bought Your Beautiful Girlfriend.

» They Say It Takes 10,000 Hours Of Practice To Perfect A Skill. You Better Get Started.

» It&Amp;Rsquo;S An Important Milestone. You Should Celebrate By Posting An Ad On Craigslist Looking For A &Amp;Ldquo;Mean Daddy&Amp;Rdquo;.

» The Sobbing Will Only Make Her Want To Hurt You More. So Maybe You Do Want To Keep Crying. I&Amp;Rsquo;M Not Here To Judge.

» You Don&Amp;Rsquo;T Really Want To Date, Do You? Wouldn&Amp;Rsquo;T You Rather Forgo A Social Life And Just Lick Mean Girls&Amp;Rsquo; Assholes?

» It&Amp;Rsquo;S Not Fair For Her To Wait From Thursday Until Friday Night To Get Her Ass Worshipped. Your Monthly Orgasm Can Wait Until Your Next Monthly Orgasm.

» If You Do A Truly Thorough Job, She May Let You Eat Actual &Amp;Lsquo;Real People&Amp;Rsquo; Food Off Of Her Ass. It&Amp;Rsquo;S Good To Have Goals.

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