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» ohshititsgreg: A part of me dies every time no one gets my joke
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Ygrittesnow: When We Were Babies My Dad Was A Stay-At-Home Dad While My Mom Kicked Ass In The Courtroom But He Would Carry My Twin Brother And Me Around With One Baby On The Front And One On His Back In Backpacks And Women Would Come Up And Look At How
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Hitlersasshole: I Burn Like 2000 Calories Everytime I Put My Bed Sheets On By Myself
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Nerdofchaos: Recreationalcannibalism: The-Adequate-Gatsby: Stultifyandstupefy: Derpes: And God Said Unto Abraham, “Abraham.” And Abraham Replied, “What.” God Said To John, “Come Forth And Receive Eternal Life.” But John Came Fifth And
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Tardis221B: When You Wake Up From A Particularly Disturbing Dream And Just Stare At The Ceiling For A While Like What Crevice Of My Mind Did That Even Seep From
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Methlabrador: A Dude At The Gym Just Reached In His Bag, Pulled Out A Bottle Of Hershey’s Chocolate Syrup, Smiled &Amp;Amp; Shook His Head Like That’s Just Something That Happens To People, Put It Back And Then Pulled Out A Bottle Of Water Instead
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Shavingryansprivates: *Lays Down To Take A Nap* *Wakes Up 8 Hours Later Pissed Off And Confused*
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Breadmaakesyoufat: Dontyoulovemebaby: Breadmaakesyoufat: Guys Its 2:Am And I Forgot What Oatmeal Meant And I Thought It Was An Emotion And I Said Outloud “Im Feeling Very Oatmeal” But It Didn’t Make Sense, So I Looked Up Oatmeal, But I Spent
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Dietchola: There Was This Girl At My School Last Year And She Fucked Literally Every Black Guy At My School And People Called Her The Night Rider So She Moved
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Macarena-Of-Time: Turn Ons: Free Shipping
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Citymod: Do You Realize That We Live In A World Where People Lick Other People’s Buttholes And Yet Some Of You Still Complain About Double Dipping Chips?
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Jehovahzwetness: Gay Marriage Should Be Legal Because Gay Divorce Court Shows Would Be Fucking Hilarious
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Biteythevillain: Biteythevillain: What If Ur Bellybutton Screamed When U Covered It W/ A Shirt Cuz Its Scared Of The Dark How Fucking High Was I Last Night
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